Posts tagged ‘Rapture’

May 20, 2011

Rapture Wear: Handi Rapture Ready Diapers for Mature Men and Women of Faith

by Accidental Bear

Get them while they’re hot! Wait, what!?!?

Order Now

Do you have what it takes to be rapture ready? We have what it takes to make you Rapture Ready. Rapture Ready Diapers automatically disolve upon completion of levitation leaving you fresh and as naked as the day you were born.
Be sure to stipulate size, When ordering note whether you wish an iPod and cell phone pocket.
All Jews must enclose a notorized certificate of religious conversion. via www.scari.org

May 8, 2011

A Friendly Reminder That The World’s Ending in Two Weeks

by Accidental Bear

I think I am prepared. In my survival kit I have Peanut M&Ms, Gummy Worms, a jug of water, toilet paper (3-ply), beef jerk, Angry Birds, and a  copy of Latin Inches. Did I miss anything? AB

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Via Gawker

Lauri Apple — In-the-know Americans have been getting ready for May 21, when Jesus is going to return to Earth and kick off the Rapture—aka “Judgment Day.” Hopefully you’re prepared for all the excitement to come, yes?

Or is this all news to you? It’s true that not everyone has been lucky enough to live or drive by one of the eye-catching “Judgment Day May 21” billboards erected by So Family Radio, the outfit that’s probably worked the hardest to make sure people are informed. Without So Family’s helpful roadside reminders, you might not have even heard about May 21 at all.

It’s also possible that you saw the news somewhere months ago and forgot. It’s okay—you’ve got so much on your mind these days! Please start paying attention now, and focus. READ MORE

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